i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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