That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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