how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
