is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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