Where is the hickey?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
