i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
