I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
