But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
