Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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