Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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