I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
