Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
