I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
