Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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