Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
