The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
