remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize