This girl is more easily done than said...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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