Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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