I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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