At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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