I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize