we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
