weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
party gras won. party gras always wins.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
