My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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