Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
