my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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