do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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