these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
you mean i was at the winter classic?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
