Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
