There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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