Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize