Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
too bad you live with your parents still
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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