So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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