And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
