Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
