can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
