youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
