dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
