we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
