a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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