i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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