we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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