I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
