Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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