Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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