Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize