Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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