you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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