4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
