she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
How does one acquire holy water?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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